Documenting My Recovery Through Photography
This whole journey of blogging started around mental health and my mental illnesses that I have come to learn of. I have tried to bring people along as best as possible, although for one reason or another I have changed up the way I do things or taken periods of time away from sharing anything, however, at all times trying to be as transparent as I possibly can to keep the conversation alive.
Recently I have been looking for ways to create new content with my limitations and share them in a way my audience and new viewers can understand and relate with an ongoing narrative if that makes sense? If not I will try to explain.
So over the last few years, I have had tons of ideas, a few I’ve shared and tried to execute but ultimately failed or not been able to continue with and others that I haven’t been even able to get off the ground. Now the reason behind this is limitations of what I can and cannot do due to some of my conditions and these conditions affect me in such a way that right now and for quite some time I have been agoraphobic with very limited ability to go outside unless with incredibly high amounts of anxiety. I have been completely stuck in terms of knowing how to get better and also been barely able to create any new content apart from the odd bit here and there. It got as bad as all of my writing was all about the negative aspects of my conditions because there have been so few positives.
This is all starting to change. Well, it feels that way and I’m very optimistic hence writing this post and planning and having an idea of a consistent way to make content going forward and with an ongoing positive narrative.
I’ve got a new therapist who I have been seeing for 3 months now? I want to say! and we’ve spent a lot of time on understanding the mind and anxiety/panic and why it all does what it does, which has been very enlightening and that has been unbelievably helpful for me because I am person who needs to understand things and then I can make sense of it and then it becomes less scary and more manageable and I feel that has already started to happen. I feel like my baseline anxiety levels have decreased significantly and following that my moods have become more stable and I have not been getting so low and depressed which is all generally positive.
Now we are past that we are beginning to learn to live with the anxiety and stop allowing it so much control and power over my life as it has been having.
In doing so instead of fighting the anxiety and wishing it would go away I have been taking the anxiety with me throughout my day and still doing what I need to do even with all the distressing symptoms. I have had to make changes to ensure I am sleeping better and eating better again but this time making sure I do it every day even when the anxiety is telling me not to.
As well as the eating and sleeping and a few other things that are personal to my exact circumstances I have been making sure to get out every single day for a walk. This started out as a small walk down to the local field and back for at most 15 minutes and a few weeks in, I now walk for half an hour around my local village as I now feel more comfortable being out for longer and being slightly further away from home.
With all these changes I wanted to incorporate photography into it somehow. I had a few ideas and I decided with being out every day that I would take pictures of around where I walk and it seemed a great way to document my recovery and learning to live with anxiety as well as getting to bring in the element of travelling and exploring new places eventually.
I can’t guarantee a new post every week but as soon as I am ready to push myself and go further afield I will be documenting it and sharing blog posts here on my blog and also sharing some of the images on my social media sites.
Keep an eye out for my first post.
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